2nd wk

is the 2nd wk of school and hell loads of projects this semester..gosh, i going to faint soon, lol..but nevertheless i will endure with this whole sem, i can do it man right..i will 1st taste the hardships and next the sweetness, praying hard for this sem, god bless me.. and also pls let me haf a regular heart beating, god, pls..is tiring to even hear my heart beat so fast and let me haf a peaceful slp every nite.. i admit i still miss him and it happens when im really down, is a habit, i noe tat..well, the good thing is my sis is giving birth soon in another few wks time, i hope she will take care of herself and im looking forward to my nephew..another family member in the family, i will open up my hands and smile at him: welcome sweety!!

comfort..

i love my mum, standing by my side, supporting me, finding ways to cure my heart pumputation, buying medicines for me, finding ways for me to slp well in the nite, juz in case i really rely out on slping pills..she sending parcels to me, with tea whr her frend mention to her some organic tea that allows her to slp well in the nite..i feel glad with all my frends ard me in perth, im also trying very hard to relaz myself, not to think so much most importantly.. i juz wan my heart to beat to the normal rate and not fast, it might take mths, a yr perhaps, but i will pray to god to help me when i needed him so..my life in perth revolves ard with classes, gym and studying in the nite aft gym..is not going to be a last minute work anymore, every1 has to change..and of cuz thanz to my buddy when i needed her so, juz a phone call and share all my happiness, sadness, gossiping..simply miss u ya..lol..the 1 who always read my blog, anyway, u noe who u r..lol..a big hug!!

depressed..

im depressed and all i needa is sum1 to tok to me..sum1 who is close to me..ass feeling..

back in perth..

finally back to perth and fulfill my last semester..is time to buck up for the brand new yr and i make sure this sem i study hard and at least get a D or HD..it is a must for me, so i muz chiong all the way..i bet this sem is a tough 1, but wat matters most is i muz put in lots of effort, pray hard and hope everything will go smoothly for me..i pray hard tat my heart will not beat so fast and never to think of ending my life..god will be by my side, i sincerly noe tat..

holidaying in genting..

i dun even noe whr i wan to go..a short trip to genting, bored though..perhaps is more to accompany my family members, rather than staying hme thinking lots..seems to be the 3rd wk and here i am still feeling down..how am i suppose to get rid of this sadness..how long will i recover..my mentality for guys totally change and all im is pursuing for rich guys..i noe this is a bad thinking but to me love is no longer impt cuz i noe aft all i will lose out again..simply noe tat i will not give all my feelings for the nx r/ns or i will pay for the consequences again..i dun wish to end up getting depressed, thinking lots..my heart is simply pain and i really dunno wat shd i do nw..anyway nx wk will be the last wk in jb and finally bck in perth..to console myself, i nd to concentrate on my studies..studies is all tat matter.. yearning for the working life..

no slp tonite..

sleepless nite..eyes tired but couldnt slp..wat in the world am i thinking abt..missing loads..god all i nd is support frm u..

blogging in cafe..

aft so many days since im bck frm perth, this is like the 1st time im blogging..lol..well so many things happen during 2008..the end of everything..sad though, but wat can i do nw..but glad thr is always a bbf out thr for me, thanz cheryl for lending me a listening ear, consoling me..taking care of me while im drunk..sorry for making a mess out of myself..but tat is wat i needed, i juz noe tat..health isnt tat gd ever since the drinking on sat..heart beating fast and mum suggested me to go for a checkup..but couldnt face the reality if anything happens to my heart..am i really suffering frm a minor depression, thinking too much, am i..well,anyway bbf i miss u alot..missing your companion..